Monday, May 11, 2009

...and you say that like it's a good thing?

I have a confession to make. I am terrible at multitasking. I have spent pretty much all of my adulthood doing it. Raising kids, working sometimes more than one job, battling cancer, running a home business, teaching sunday school, being a mentor, neighborhood association, PTA, volunteer to whatever needed some help, going to school...all at once. Honestly. Insane. Now I wonder what people REALLY meant when they said, "I don't know how you do it" or "You do so much!"...

I had an epiphany today though. My mind is always on the next thing. It is rarely right here in the present. I am calculating the next move, the next stop, the next something. What I fail to see in the present. Okay, like I have put on close to 10 pounds, parts of my house are a mess, I don't have time to pray and study the bible...You know things that are important. So here I am 6 days from 40 and really saying to myself was any of the pursuit worth it??? Right now I am saying no.

So what now? I withdrew from class. I stopped working 10-12 hour days at work. I gave up a lot of things at church quite a while ago. I will go to bed at a decent hour, wake up at a reasonable time, excercise my body, mind and spirit. Now is the time! I don't want to miss out on anything else that I SAID was important but in reality my actions said something else.

As of right now the only things I NEED to do is go to work, come home and go to bed. Sounds boring but trust me, in my crazy multi-tasking, multi-faceted, crazy world that is all I need.

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